Today I Consign To Hell -the All Saints version

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  • ArielAriel Shipmate
    It was always touch-and-go as to whether the bus from the office would get us to the station in time. Now and again they changed the bus stops out of pure malice, so that you arrived at the furthest possible end of the bus area and had to run into the station and hurl yourself through the barriers and up a flight of stairs to make your train with maybe two minutes to spare.

    My trains were awkwardly timed. If I missed the one I needed to get, there was a 45 minute wait for the next which was timed to arrive just after the connection I needed to make. It made it a long day as I would then have been away from home for 12 hours.

    I can't really complain though as I used to catch the morning train with someone who did Birmingham to Swindon every day, changing trains twice each journey. I don't know how he survived it.

  • SpikeSpike Ecclesiantics & MW Host, Admin Emeritus
    Pomona wrote: »
    KarlLB wrote: »
    I don't trust people to sell me the best ticket, to be honest.

    There shouldn't *be* a best ticket. This is part of what’s wrong with the railways now. Having to book in advance is a pain - I want to walk on when I need to make a journey, flash my debit card and that be that.

    Exactly. It already happens on the Tube so there's no reason it can't happen on normal trains too.

    It does happen on normal trains in London if you’re travelling within the London fare zones
  • The publisher of David Thorne's Mass of St Thomas. Filling in for a stricken colleague I was appalled to discover this only seems to exist in a choral copy with the organ part in a faint small size - what the "$*! It's not something I like in any case but this seems particularly obtuse.
  • EigonEigon Shipmate
    Thank goodness about Hereford ticket office, Baptist Trainfan! I always go there when I travel, and almost always get a better deal than if I tried to book online.
  • ArielAriel Shipmate
    Got a ticket at the station today which was £11 cheaper than the version available online or via a machine. Staff looking very grumpy at the thought of having ticket offices closed and lots of signs up saying "Make your views known". I told them I already had and have signed a petition as well.
  • ICTH Bride's Mothers, all of them. I've had two in the past week that were enough to try the patience of a saint. How much evidence do you have to give them that the Bridal March from Lohengrin isn't "The Wedding March"? And as for the one who assures me that Widor is starts with a 'V' - *&"*.
  • BroJamesBroJames Purgatory Host
    @TheOrganist, but they probably know something about music , or if they don’t, they know what they like. :naughty:
  • They really, really don't.
  • Just out of interest @TheOrganist , do you ever have to deal with Brides' Mothers who simply let you suggest and advise as to the music? It must make it much easier for you, if such Beings exist!
    :wink:

    The same goes for Funerals and their music, too, I guess.
  • My argument with weddings and funerals is when people want favourite (to them) which are in fact totally obscure and will be sung badly.
  • Indeed - which is where expert advice from minister or musician is sorely needed.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    David had to play for the funeral of some toff or other in Northern Ireland, whose family had requested that he play Thank heaven for little girls as people were coming in. He obliged (he was a very obliging chap), but felt a complete numpty, as there was nothing on the order of service about it, or why it was being played, and the incoming congregation must have wondered what the **** he was doing.

    I think there was an equally inappropriate request for extroit music, but I can't remember what it was.
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    I thought that song was taboo since Yewtree...
  • @Piglet Priceless!
    Some years ago I did a wedding for a grandchild of American composer John W Bratton who asked if some version of his most famous oeuvre could be included in the music during the signing of the registers. I had great fun sorting out an arrangement for organ and 3 treble parts of The Teddy Bear's Picnic.
  • edited July 2023
    TITCH the person who ran into my car while I was parked in a parking lot, eating a hamburger IN MY CAR with no other cars within 15m. You, sir, ran into a parked car in the middle of an empty parking lot. :angry:
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    edited July 2023
    @Piglet Priceless!
    Some years ago I did a wedding for a grandchild of American composer John W Bratton who asked if some version of his most famous oeuvre could be included in the music during the signing of the registers. I had great fun sorting out an arrangement for organ and 3 treble parts of The Teddy Bear's Picnic.

    I rather approve of that! 🧸

    When the Dean's son in Newfoundland got married, they requested the Star Wars theme, and David suggested it be interwoven into Widor's Toccata, as an extroit. It worked beautifully!
  • Piglet wrote: »
    @Piglet Priceless!
    Some years ago I did a wedding for a grandchild of American composer John W Bratton who asked if some version of his most famous oeuvre could be included in the music during the signing of the registers. I had great fun sorting out an arrangement for organ and 3 treble parts of The Teddy Bear's Picnic.

    I rather approve of that! 🧸

    When the Dean's son in Newfoundland got married, they requested the Star Wars theme, and David suggested it be interwoven into Widor's Toccata, as an extroit. It worked beautifully!

    Yep we had Bach that morphed into "A whiter shade of pale"

    In was the same organist as my parents and grandparents (24 years and 49 years previously) who was my grandad's cousin (their respective Mothers being sisters).
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    At my brother's first wedding, the bride actually came in to A Whiter Shade of Pale.

    It was in 1975 ... :mrgreen:
  • Piglet wrote: »
    At my brother's first wedding, the bride actually came in to A Whiter Shade of Pale.

    It was in 1975 ... :mrgreen:

    Yeah we did when we redid our vows for our 40th a couple of years ago.
  • SpikeSpike Ecclesiantics & MW Host, Admin Emeritus
    TICTH Audi drivers.

    That’s all.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    All of them, or just specific ones? Are they living up to their reputation of tailgating?

    I have no dog in this fight; I'm not even sure that I know anyone who drives an Audi (I know one or two people who used to, but don't know if they still do).
  • Mr Heavenly drives an Audi. No points on license, no accidents, drives politely and always sticks to speed limit.
  • Wimbledon. Why does the BBC block two channels? (Mind you I'd also add motor racing for other reasons).
  • SpikeSpike Ecclesiantics & MW Host, Admin Emeritus
    Piglet wrote: »
    All of them, or just specific ones? Are they living up to their reputation of tailgating?

    All of them. Every single one without exception.
  • Baptist TrainfanBaptist Trainfan Shipmate
    edited July 2023
    Wimbledon. Why does the BBC block two channels?
    Couldn't agree more - especially as tennis is hardly featured for the rest of the year.

    Code fix - Piglet, AS host

  • ICTH My friend J's vicar. The poor girl was in tears last night after a "discussion" she was subjected to with helpful remarks about the Canons relating to music (of course, the pastor concerned can't read music... ).😡
  • HuiaHuia Shipmate
    @TheOrganist - Sounds like a case of "The less you know, the more qualified you are to advise others"
  • The problem is the dear girl is an incurable optimist and greets every new vicar with hope that they'll be appreciative of the music and supportive of the singers - and every time it doesn't happen. I mean, how big a deal is it to drop into a choir rehearsal once a term just to say hello and thanks for all you do?
  • I wish somewhere even hotter for 'caregivers' who steal from their patients.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Now that really is despicable.

    TICTH my printer. It said it wanted ink; I fed it. It says it wants paper, which is a lie*, and it refuses to print.

    * when I replaced the ink, it spat out a couple of pages of the usual post-ink-replacement gobbledygook, rather like burping a baby after it's been fed, so it was perfectly aware that it had paper.
  • Have you tried switching it off, unplugging it for 5 minutes, and then starting again?
  • ArethosemyfeetArethosemyfeet Shipmate, Heaven Host
    Have you tried switching it off, unplugging it for 5 minutes, and then starting again?

    Failing that, threaten to turn it into a toaster.
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    On techie woes, after 5 days and several protracted hats with people in Mumbai, my phone is working again (new SIM card).

    Meanwhile Mr F has a new toy - a Nespresso machine. It comes with its own app, which needs Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and possibly your soul.
  • NenyaNenya All Saints Host, Ecclesiantics & MW Host
    Firenze wrote: »
    Meanwhile Mr F has a new toy - a Nespresso machine. It comes with its own app, which needs Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and possibly your soul.
    :lol:
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Have you tried switching it off, unplugging it for 5 minutes, and then starting again?

    Of course - that's No. 1 in the troubleshooting guide, isn't it? Actually, it had been turned off for some time, as it had been temporarily relocated to the bedroom when I was having the painting and new flooring done.

    Failing that, threaten to turn it into a toaster.

    Yup, tried that too. :mrgreen:

  • ArethosemyfeetArethosemyfeet Shipmate, Heaven Host
    Damn, that just leaves percussive therapy.
  • la vie en rougela vie en rouge Purgatory Host, Circus Host
    Douglas Adams reckoned the way to aggravate a computer was to sit next to it and count.
  • PuzzlerPuzzler Shipmate
    Cables.
    I have broken my Shark ( hoover). It is only a few months old but won’t be covered by guarantee because Blockages aren’t, and the damage will be deemed to be “accidental, caused by negligent use or care, or careless operation”.
    I managed to catch a phone charging cable in it. I know I should have moved it. The wretched cable didn’t even work.
    I am hoping the clever people at the local independent shop where I bought it can extract the cable without causing further damage.
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    Douglas Adams reckoned the way to aggravate a computer was to sit next to it and count.

    You shouldn't anthropomorphise computers: they don't like it.
  • Firenze wrote: »
    Douglas Adams reckoned the way to aggravate a computer was to sit next to it and count.

    You shouldn't anthropomorphise computers: they don't like it.

    There's AI for you.
  • PuzzlerPuzzler Shipmate
    Cable extracted. No excuse to avoid housework now.
  • FirenzeFirenze Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    Puzzler wrote: »
    Cable extracted. No excuse to avoid housework now.

    Oh I'm sure you can think of something. Mine's usually 'sure who sees it?'
  • Firenze wrote: »
    Puzzler wrote: »
    Cable extracted. No excuse to avoid housework now.

    Oh I'm sure you can think of something. Mine's usually 'sure who sees it?'

    Mine is, "leave it, after three years it doesn't get any worse", and, "cat hair is good for the carpet".
  • Not sure where to put this, but this item from today's Guardian seems to indicate that England (or the housing market, at any rate) is rapidly heading for Hell in a handbasket:

    https://www.theguardian.com/society/2023/jul/30/step-to-riches-disused-stairwell-in-london-could-be-yours-for-just-20000

    I'm reminded of the *Four Yorkshiremen* sketch:

    You lived in a corridor? We used to dream of living in a corridor...
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    TICTH businesses who pay minimum wage, invite you for a "chat", say they'll get back to you and from whom you never hear back again.

    I could never get a Summer job as a student and my two sons are finding the exact same, instead getting the above treatment.

    How people actually get these waiting, bartending etc. jobs I shall never know.
  • DoublethinkDoublethink Admin, 8th Day Host
    Back in the day when I was young, in the last millennium, I walked around the town going into every shop and restaurant and asked for a summer job. On the occasions I did this, I had one by the end of the day - I was only asking for temporary work though.
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    Back in the day when I was young, in the last millennium, I walked around the town going into every shop and restaurant and asked for a summer job. On the occasions I did this, I had one by the end of the day - I was only asking for temporary work though.

    This is temporary work they're looking for. Most of the places in town just tell you to apply on their website. Which you do. And hear nothing.
  • ArielAriel Shipmate
    KarlLB wrote: »
    TICTH businesses who pay minimum wage, invite you for a "chat", say they'll get back to you and from whom you never hear back again.

    I could never get a Summer job as a student and my two sons are finding the exact same, instead getting the above treatment.

    How people actually get these waiting, bartending etc. jobs I shall never know.

    Networking. Know anyone in the field you can ask about forthcoming vacancies?

    Though admittedly it is a rough job market at present with so many out there having been made redundant in the past few years, or trying to find jobs that pay a living wage.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    When I finally got the right to work in Canada, I handed my CV in to nearly every shop in the local shopping centre, and within a few days had a temporary, part-time, minimum wage job, but maybe I was just lucky with my timing - it was coming up to Christmas.
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