Church conversations
The interesting. The edifying. The baffling.
The unusual? At the church steps after the service at a church I visited yesterday.
"Thank you, Father."
"Hello. I noticed you didn't take Communion."
"Oh. Um. Well. There's a history there, Father! *nervous laugh*"
"Oh. You seemed to know the responses. Where are you from?"
...
While being taken aback at the time to be asked that question, and straightaway, clearly Communion is central to him and a key ritual in one's faith. Thinking on it after I left the church grounds, it did make me pleasantly disposed to him. As did him asking a few questions while other poor parishioners queued behind me, no doubt longily waiting for their tea and biscuits.
The unusual? At the church steps after the service at a church I visited yesterday.
"Thank you, Father."
"Hello. I noticed you didn't take Communion."
"Oh. Um. Well. There's a history there, Father! *nervous laugh*"
"Oh. You seemed to know the responses. Where are you from?"
...
While being taken aback at the time to be asked that question, and straightaway, clearly Communion is central to him and a key ritual in one's faith. Thinking on it after I left the church grounds, it did make me pleasantly disposed to him. As did him asking a few questions while other poor parishioners queued behind me, no doubt longily waiting for their tea and biscuits.
Comments
The only exchange I had yesterday with Father M (a lovely, but awkward, man) was how slowly and well I had read the lessons of the day. Was this a back-handed compliment? I can stammer quite badly in face to face conversation.
Blessings XX
Different strokes for different folks, I guess.
Don’t assume it was backhanded—more likely he was delighted not to have someone galloping through and mangling half the sentences as they did so!
That was my reaction, too. I'm afraid I would have politely told the minister to mind their own business, or words to that effect.
I would have found it a bit intrusive too, but then RR knows the guy and we don't and it could have been an offer of pastoral support.
Yes. I recall my father's one visit to the local Baptist church. Their attempts to be friendly and welcoming were interpreted as being nosey and intrusive and he never went back.
'You seemed to believe what you were saying.'
'Thank you.'
A thought afterwards: I wonder whether that was a compliment?
Nevertheless, it really is not the priest's business to ask why someone who is a visitor or newcomer doesn't receive Communion. If s/he sees a regular communicant refraining, maybe over several weeks, then a discreet pastoral enquiry might be appropriate.
I took a funeral at which one of those attending was a media figure (a nephew of the deceased), well-known for being anti-religious. At the door they simply said, "Well spoken".
Elderly widow 1. "I really hope his wife has put out this week."
Elderly widow 2. " If she hasn't, it's not for want of him hinting."
Umm, if the call of the Father is to preach the Word and administer the Sacraments (as specified in a Lutheran call), then it is his business, though I do not think it would be a good time to discuss why a person may or may not have taken the sacrament at the church door--maybe in a follow up visit (if the Father is so inclined).
Anyway, conversations in the church porch. It is the 1970s and I am wearing a hand-sewn maxi dress composed of patchwork. Pastor's Wife: 'It must be great to have the skill to make it. And the nerve to wear it'.
The Merriam-Webster dictionary doesn’t indicate that it’s a regional usage, which it normally does when appropriate.
edit: we have the other usage mentioned too; I think it is more common
🤣
The church had run an Alpha course, which included Nicky Gumbel banging on about the Joys of Married Sex. I suspect the minister may have been inspired by that and horrified if he'd realised that some of the congregation were assuming he'd hit a dry spell!
There were also videos by some bloke in a cardigan giving advice on Christian parenting who also thought Married Sex was wonderful. It seemed to be quite the thing at the time.
Bishop one: 'I didn't have sex with my wife before we married. Did you?'
Bishop two: 'I can't remenber, ..... what was her maiden name?'
Back to the topic .......
ITTWACW!
I can think of several elderly women parishioners in my current place who would roar if I shared this with them!
Oops! I meant roar with laughter...
Which churches would assume that everyone walking through the door was a commumicant? Our village Anglican church gets a variety of visitors including those who who may be coming to take a very tentative look at "Church" and whom we would not expect to wish to receive communion, as well as ones who do, and are welcome.
A good question. Certainly the C of E is supposed to be the church for everyone, and (as I said earlier) it's none of the priest's immediate business to ask why someone s/he's perhaps never seen before didn't receive Communion.
Thank you for your stories.
* not a priest; if a misguided bishop got into his head to ordain me into holy orders I'd be burnt to a crisp instantly by lightning to prevent it happening...
I take the view that the very occasional person who receives without knowing what they are doing isn’t going to come to harm, whereas to cause fuss or embarrassment for someone at that moment is quite likely to be a stumbling block in whatever faith journey they may be on.
Oh well, better late than never!
When I returned to worship (after 9 years!) earlier this year the priest at a new parish asked one of the parishioners to take me to the hall for tea. I appreciated that, but could see others may not. A priest in another city I once lived in invited me to lunch at his place, with assorted other singles or those he thought may benefit. He never seemed put out when I said I couldn't make it, but did appear a little disappointed. I am a bit of a loner so sometimes such things, though appreciated, are a bit much.
There are assumptions about sin preventing reception that are deeply ingrained in RC psyche. It would be like asking "Aye, aye .... what have you been up to then?"
As I understand it, there are churches which will deny the Eucharist to non-members (while happy to accept money in the plate). If I encountered that, I would be much more upset.
Strictly speaking, the Roman Catholic and Orthodox churches restrict communion to members, and I believe clergy often make this point during a service.
This happened in reverse in an ecumenical setting where I was presiding, where a RC Permanent Deacon explained how he was unable to receive the Sacrament from me.
IMO it's a crying shame that the meal which is supposed to unite us does the exact opposite.
As a tangent perhaps RC speak calls the Saturday of Easter week Easter Saturday. The Saturday which is the Vigil of Easter is called Holy Saturday. What is in a name ?
What is in a Sacrament ?
Not sure I understand the first paragraph. For me the Eucharist expresses a unity that isn't there, so for my part I don't communicate in other denominations' churches.
Surely the 'regret' expressed shows an understanding that we are really all one BUT we still have different understandings of what is meant and understood by the word 'Church' and the word'Eucharist'