I agree about the intonation. I normally see those who live with parents being referred to as adults who live with parents.
I do wonder at what age it switches from being an adult who lives with their parents to an adult whose parents live with them? Does it depend on who’s name the house is under?
A (sliding glass) door wall is only on an outside wall, and has glass.
The interior doors between rooms, or a room and the hallway, we would call "a sliding door", or if one is very upscale, "a pocket door."
Sliding doors slide along to the outside of the wall, pocket doors slide into the wall. (Can you tell we’ve just had a major rebuild?).
As I hear and see the terms used where I live, a “sliding door” is a glass door in an exterior wall that slides in front of a window that is identical but stationary. A “pocket door” slides into an interior wall. A door that slides along the outside of an interior wall is a “barn door.”
I can't think what else you would call your children who are adults, other than your adult children. I have two adult children and whether they live with me or not would make no difference to the phrase I would use to describe them. What else are you going to say? "My mature offspring?"
Since I have four children all more-or-less adult, ‘adult children’ would be my natural way of referring to them. To say I have four sons and daughters would be odd, and indeed confusing as some might think I had four daughters AND four sons.
I’d either say “we have two children”—I probably wouldn’t say “adult children” or “grown children” unless the context seemed to require it—or “we have a son and a daughter.”
I agree about the intonation. I normally see those who live with parents being referred to as adults who live with parents.
I do wonder at what age it switches from being an adult who lives with their parents to an adult whose parents live with them? Does it depend on who’s name the house is under?
Not sure it switches. We have an elderly lady at church who is - well, let's call her north of 90. Still lives at home, in the home that she and her late husband lived and raised their kids. One daughter lives with her, and has done for quite some time. It started off as more of a financial arrangement (daughter needed a place to live and couldn't afford a place of her own), and now that her mother is frailer, she does more of the work around the home and keeping an eye on mother.
She'd still describe it as her mother's home.
Whereas if you have the case that the children have left home, established their own home, and then an elderly parent has moved in with them, then that would be the parent living with their child(ren).
I think it’s more about custom myself—if it’s been the home of one or the other for quite some time before the other generation moved in, I’d expect people to keep calling it that person’s home by sheer inertia.
I think the individual was stretching to try to coin a phrase. I have always known "adult children" to mean children who are of an age that we considered that of an adult.
Agreed. The usage of the person on the radio seems to be idiosyncratic! It seems many of us are accustomed to the usage that "adult children" refers to their age and doesn't have anything to do with their place of residence.
My aunt once inquired whether I was going home for Christmas to which I replied that I was already at home. She meant my mother's house. I meant the flat I was currently renting.
I've had this "where's home" question from others before, but my parents' house wasn't my home once I'd moved out, as far as I was concerned. It isn't if you're resident somewhere else.
Apologies to my American friends, but here's an example of some Californian (I presume) gobbledegook from way back in the '70s.
I remember hearing my mother give a yelp from the kitchen when preparing the Sunday dinner. We always had roasts back then. Roast beef and Yorkshire pudding. A chicken sometimes.
Anyhow, I dashed through thinking she'd scalded herself.
She explained what had happened.
She had the radio on and they were interviewing an American woman about something. What caused the yelp was the woman saying, 'Well, at my maturation juncture ...'
Whaa-aaa-aatt?!
Maturation juncture?!
What she meant, of course was, 'Well, at my age ...'
I've not heard anything like that for a good while but are weird and unnecessarily convoluted phrases still coined in the US?
I might be wrong but I've tended to see abuses like this as a West Coast thing.
Dude, lay off the West Coast! I'm a California girl myself, and we have our share of nuts, as everyone does! And that idiocy is NOT "a West Coast" thing.
My aunt once inquired whether I was going home for Christmas to which I replied that I was already at home. She meant my mother's house. I meant the flat I was currently renting.
I've had this "where's home" question from others before, but my parents' house wasn't my home once I'd moved out, as far as I was concerned. It isn't if you're resident somewhere else.
A month ago I heard my son in talking about his travel plans to and from college. He referred to both places as "going home" (and then looked nervous, till he realized I'd done the same thing in my response). I think it's just human to refer that way to any place you spend a lot of time living in.
Ok. Keep your hair on. I know I was riffing with a caricature of the West Coast and the woman could have come from Wisconsin as far as I know. You'll notice that I didn't say that all Americans come out with convoluted phrases like that and that I've not heard anything like that for a good while.
I'm more than happy to provide examples of egregious abuse of the English language from these shores.
We are ostensibly talking about Pond differences in speech and idiom. This struck me as an example. I'm not accusing all Americans or all Californians of spouting stuff like that.
We are ostensibly talking about Pond differences in speech and idiom. This struck me as an example. I'm not accusing all Americans or all Californians of spouting stuff like that.
It’s so off the wall that I can hardly see it as an example of some kind of generic pond difference.
There was a great cartoon called Dilbert in the 1990s (when we still read printed newspapers) that made fun of stupid and dehumanizing office culture. And Office Speak. (Shudder. )
Dilbert is still subverting the white collar work world at dilbert.com. One of the best jokes was when the idiot boss sent out a memo that directed the staff to use "implementation phase" instead of something simple like "do."
Which brings to mind Weird Al's genius song Mission Statement! The higher you go up the org chart, the worse and worse worse it gets. Not even qualified to be called Barbaric Yawp.
Two of my young coworkers who are old enough to know better use the word "utilize" relentlessly in place of "use." I keep correcting them. MacGyver utilized a binder clip and a bowling ball to repair a nuclear reactor. He used a tooth brush to clean his teeth.
I've had this "where's home" question from others before, but my parents' house wasn't my home once I'd moved out, as far as I was concerned. It isn't if you're resident somewhere else.
My parents used to refer to visiting my grandparents for Christmas as "going home". They also used to refer to the house we lived in as "home". Home is context-dependent.
Yes, when my mother and father were alive and in their house, I would say I was going home for a visit, but then when the visit was over and I left, I was going home to my apartment.
'Home' for my mother was always a farm in Co Monaghan. True, she had a rather peripatetic married life, but even when we bought a house and settled in one place, it was a home but not Home.
I still use home in some contexts to mean Ireland - ie where I come from rather than where I live.
My youngest grandson would be seriously challenged if asked where home is, as he spends equal time with each ( divorced and remarried) parent. Fortunately the two homes are only five miles apart.
My parents used to refer to visiting my grandparents for Christmas as "going home". They also used to refer to the house we lived in as "home". Home is context-dependent.
Yes, when my mother and father were alive and in their house, I would say I was going home for a visit, but then when the visit was over and I left, I was going home to my apartment.
Yes to both of these.
Relatedly, there’s the question of “where are you from?” At least in my corner of the American South, that can just as easily mean “where did you grow up?” or “where is your family from?” as “where do you live now?”
And if we are on holiday and discussing going back to our hotel after being out, we'll often say 'let's go home'. So it really is a flexible word! I guess it's wherever I lay my hat...
I've always thought "it's wherever I hang my hat" but in recent years I'm coming to the conclusion it's where your heart is. I've rented a lot of places I wouldn't say ever felt like home.
As for "where are you from" I have no idea how to answer this. Where you are born, grew up, lived the longest, live now, or ethnic identity?
Ethnic identity is fairly tightly delineated between northern Irish and Lowland Scottish. Family names - Orr, Dunlop, Irwin but also Crozier and McCartney. Main family name traceable back to 18th C in and around the Clogher valley.
I've always thought "it's wherever I hang my hat" but in recent years I'm coming to the conclusion it's where your heart is. I've rented a lot of places I wouldn't say ever felt like home.
As for "where are you from" I have no idea how to answer this. Where you are born, grew up, lived the longest, live now, or ethnic identity?
I answer more or less at random, picking the one I want as the mood takes me.
Yes, I thought of the Paul Young song (a boy from my home town, one of my brother in laws had been in a previous band with him. That song was on the first album I owned)
Home for me is the area we lived and raised our children before we retired even though we moved to this area 20 years ago. If people ask where are you from? I say there and not where I was born and raised or live now.
It's interesting reading all the comments about where home is. After moving around the state a few times my parents settled and built their home when I was in late high school. I think I lived there for 6 years, so I think this influenced my view of where home was.
Since I've been married home is always where I live with my husband. If people asked me how I'd spend a major holiday I'd either answer, at Mum & Dad's place, or with the in-laws. Or sometimes we'd host, but that was rare and as parents aged they preferred to stay close to their homes.
Home is where those I love best are so, my other half and my kids, as they still live with us
Another language difference that has been highlighted elsewhere to me is the elevation of leadership titles.
It is well known that pretty well anyone in management in the US seems to be called vice-president of xyz, whereas in the UK, they tend - unless owned in the US - to be at best "head of" - or just "xyz manager".
But the one that alerted me to this was that in the UK, the head of a university is a vice-chancellor. Not even an actual chancellor. Whereas in the US they are president.
One difference I've noticed is some US speakers saying they e.g. "make chicken" for dinner.
To us in the UK that would imply you had the ability to actually create chickens.
We might say "made a chicken curry", but if we were giving no information beyond the chicken, we'd say "I cooked chicken".
While I'm at it, spaghetti here refers to the pasta itself; it's not the dish. And under no circumstances are individual pasta pieces called "noodles".
We've been down this path many times over the years. American English and British English are continuing to diverge. They are becoming separate languages and have their own terms of reference for things, and that's absolutely fine. Americans are free to say they make chicken or they eat spaghetti noodles if they want. The UK view is not definitive of how English should be across the entire world. Let them get on with making chicken or fixing dinner if they want. Life's too short.
We've been down this path many times over the years. American English and British English are continuing to diverge. They are becoming separate languages and have their own terms of reference for things, and that's absolutely fine. Americans are free to say they make chicken or they eat spaghetti noodles if they want. The UK view is not definitive of how English should be across the entire world. Let them get on with making chicken or fixing dinner if they want. Life's too short.
I'm illustrating a language difference, which is what I thought this thread was about.
Uk universities do have a Chancellor, but it is more of an honour than a working role.
Sorry, true. What I meant is that the role of running the university is the VC. As you say, the Chancellor is a ceremonial role.
And the university that we went to has a Chancellor, whose role is not just the ceremonial you note, but also to preside over the Senate and provide overall guidance to the Vice Chancellor who is in effect the CEO.
Comments
I do wonder at what age it switches from being an adult who lives with their parents to an adult whose parents live with them? Does it depend on who’s name the house is under?
As I hear and see the terms used where I live, a “sliding door” is a glass door in an exterior wall that slides in front of a window that is identical but stationary. A “pocket door” slides into an interior wall. A door that slides along the outside of an interior wall is a “barn door.”
Daughters and/or sons?
My husband often jokingly refers to our daughters as "offspring", usually in the form of "Good morning, Offspring!"
Not sure it switches. We have an elderly lady at church who is - well, let's call her north of 90. Still lives at home, in the home that she and her late husband lived and raised their kids. One daughter lives with her, and has done for quite some time. It started off as more of a financial arrangement (daughter needed a place to live and couldn't afford a place of her own), and now that her mother is frailer, she does more of the work around the home and keeping an eye on mother.
She'd still describe it as her mother's home.
Whereas if you have the case that the children have left home, established their own home, and then an elderly parent has moved in with them, then that would be the parent living with their child(ren).
Agreed. The usage of the person on the radio seems to be idiosyncratic! It seems many of us are accustomed to the usage that "adult children" refers to their age and doesn't have anything to do with their place of residence.
I've had this "where's home" question from others before, but my parents' house wasn't my home once I'd moved out, as far as I was concerned. It isn't if you're resident somewhere else.
I remember hearing my mother give a yelp from the kitchen when preparing the Sunday dinner. We always had roasts back then. Roast beef and Yorkshire pudding. A chicken sometimes.
Anyhow, I dashed through thinking she'd scalded herself.
She explained what had happened.
She had the radio on and they were interviewing an American woman about something. What caused the yelp was the woman saying, 'Well, at my maturation juncture ...'
Whaa-aaa-aatt?!
Maturation juncture?!
What she meant, of course was, 'Well, at my age ...'
I've not heard anything like that for a good while but are weird and unnecessarily convoluted phrases still coined in the US?
I might be wrong but I've tended to see abuses like this as a West Coast thing.
A month ago I heard my son in talking about his travel plans to and from college. He referred to both places as "going home" (and then looked nervous, till he realized I'd done the same thing in my response). I think it's just human to refer that way to any place you spend a lot of time living in.
I'm more than happy to provide examples of egregious abuse of the English language from these shores.
We are ostensibly talking about Pond differences in speech and idiom. This struck me as an example. I'm not accusing all Americans or all Californians of spouting stuff like that.
Dilbert is still subverting the white collar work world at dilbert.com. One of the best jokes was when the idiot boss sent out a memo that directed the staff to use "implementation phase" instead of something simple like "do."
Which brings to mind Weird Al's genius song Mission Statement! The higher you go up the org chart, the worse and worse worse it gets. Not even qualified to be called Barbaric Yawp.
Two of my young coworkers who are old enough to know better use the word "utilize" relentlessly in place of "use." I keep correcting them. MacGyver utilized a binder clip and a bowling ball to repair a nuclear reactor. He used a tooth brush to clean his teeth.
True dat.
My parents used to refer to visiting my grandparents for Christmas as "going home". They also used to refer to the house we lived in as "home". Home is context-dependent.
For Dad the reasoning was, "I own the house and am perfectly capable of looking after myself."
I still use home in some contexts to mean Ireland - ie where I come from rather than where I live.
Relatedly, there’s the question of “where are you from?” At least in my corner of the American South, that can just as easily mean “where did you grow up?” or “where is your family from?” as “where do you live now?”
As for "where are you from" I have no idea how to answer this. Where you are born, grew up, lived the longest, live now, or ethnic identity?
But I figured “wherever I lay my hat” was quite close enough to earn a point.
I answer more or less at random, picking the one I want as the mood takes me.
Depends which song you think it's alluding to! This is the one that came to my mind (I didn't even know the one you linked to!) https://youtu.be/UefQPKl-6qw?si=gT68s4-JlxHd4R8_
I thought it was alluding to Papa Was A Rollin' Stone.
Since I've been married home is always where I live with my husband. If people asked me how I'd spend a major holiday I'd either answer, at Mum & Dad's place, or with the in-laws. Or sometimes we'd host, but that was rare and as parents aged they preferred to stay close to their homes.
Home is where those I love best are so, my other half and my kids, as they still live with us
It is well known that pretty well anyone in management in the US seems to be called vice-president of xyz, whereas in the UK, they tend - unless owned in the US - to be at best "head of" - or just "xyz manager".
But the one that alerted me to this was that in the UK, the head of a university is a vice-chancellor. Not even an actual chancellor. Whereas in the US they are president.
Sorry, true. What I meant is that the role of running the university is the VC. As you say, the Chancellor is a ceremonial role.
To us in the UK that would imply you had the ability to actually create chickens.
We might say "made a chicken curry", but if we were giving no information beyond the chicken, we'd say "I cooked chicken".
While I'm at it, spaghetti here refers to the pasta itself; it's not the dish. And under no circumstances are individual pasta pieces called "noodles".
I'm illustrating a language difference, which is what I thought this thread was about.
And the university that we went to has a Chancellor, whose role is not just the ceremonial you note, but also to preside over the Senate and provide overall guidance to the Vice Chancellor who is in effect the CEO.