Bloke goes to the doctor with a strange set of symptoms. Doctor says "there are some tests I can do, but they're not covered by the NHS so they will cost"
"Don't care" the patient days "this itching is killing me!"
So the doctor rings a buzzer and a nurse with a Labrador comes in and lets the dog sniff him. It then does two short barks and a long growl, which the doctor notes down, and leaves.
Then he presses the buzzer again, the door opens, and a cat wanders in, rubs itself on the guy's legs, and lets out a "mwrrrr bip bip" noise, which the doctor notes down. Then the cat wanders over to a pile of cushions in the corner and goes to sleep, clearly exhausted.
"I know what's wrong now" the doctor says. He hands him some tablets and says "that'll" be £1,010 please".
The bloke is staggered "What are these? Solid gold?"
"No. The tablets are a tenner. But it's £500 for the cat scan and another £500 for the lab tests."
2 on f/b tonight, the first from the National Trust:
Come for the heritage, stay because you’ve forgotten where you parked your car.
And the second:
Sixteen sodium atoms walked into a bar followed by Batman.
It says something about me that I had to look up the other side of the joke. The real answer is that Dark Justiciars do not share information. That sort of thing leads to wanting to remember your childhood, sparing Selenite celestials, and apostasising.
It says something about me that I had to look up the other side of the joke. The real answer is that Dark Justiciars do not share information. That sort of thing leads to wanting to remember your childhood, sparing Selenite celestials, and apostasising.
Ah, but that's part of the joke - they put information on
SharPoint
safe in the knowledge that no one will ever look at it.
Comments
"Don't care" the patient days "this itching is killing me!"
So the doctor rings a buzzer and a nurse with a Labrador comes in and lets the dog sniff him. It then does two short barks and a long growl, which the doctor notes down, and leaves.
Then he presses the buzzer again, the door opens, and a cat wanders in, rubs itself on the guy's legs, and lets out a "mwrrrr bip bip" noise, which the doctor notes down. Then the cat wanders over to a pile of cushions in the corner and goes to sleep, clearly exhausted.
"I know what's wrong now" the doctor says. He hands him some tablets and says "that'll" be £1,010 please".
The bloke is staggered "What are these? Solid gold?"
"No. The tablets are a tenner. But it's £500 for the cat scan and another £500 for the lab tests."
Come for the heritage, stay because you’ve forgotten where you parked your car.
And the second:
Sixteen sodium atoms walked into a bar followed by Batman.
The atomic symbol for Sodium is Na.
Still don't get it.
The theme for Batman is often written as "na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na, Batman!"
"Dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner dinner Batman!"
Moving on slightly, but staying in the 1970s:
Tonto saw the Lone Ranger on his horse carrying a dustbin and asked him where he was going
"To the dump; to the dump; to the dump dump dump"
Me neither. But I like the Covid joke as I tested positive yesterday!
Yes, it's the rhythm of Vader's theme tune.
Durham, Durham, Durham Durham Durham
There's a "theme" to these last few posts.
How do the Dark Justiciars share information?
Ah, but that's part of the joke - they put information on
What did the hanger say to the coat?
We need to hang out some time.